Thursday, April 10, 2008
Meltdown
Today was a horrible, terrible, no good, very bad day. I totally lost my cool in a meeting and blew up about a situation that has been bothering me for a long time. It was a culmination of things, really...work being hard (duh, that's why it's called work), seemingly endless fundraising for workcamp, and other stressors I can't go into here.
The thing that bothers me most, or rather the two things, is that my compadres all kind of wrote off my blow up. Like it was ok? Because it was bound to happen? It's true - I reached my complete limit. It was literally the straw. But for me, it wasn't ok.
I don't like me when I act like that.
I came home, went to youth group, came home again, watched "The Last Lecture" and cried literally for two and half hours.
Today, I felt much better, mainly because I feel like I have nothing left. I am a rung out dishrag.
The thing that bothers me most, or rather the two things, is that my compadres all kind of wrote off my blow up. Like it was ok? Because it was bound to happen? It's true - I reached my complete limit. It was literally the straw. But for me, it wasn't ok.
I don't like me when I act like that.
I came home, went to youth group, came home again, watched "The Last Lecture" and cried literally for two and half hours.
Today, I felt much better, mainly because I feel like I have nothing left. I am a rung out dishrag.
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